I had a request from one of the readers about writing up on what the engagement process in Japan would be like. So here is something what I learned about the Japanese engagement from the wedding magazine.
1. Asking his parents permission.
– Man takes his girlfriend his home so he can intorudce her to his parents. It is interesting but in Japan, man usually only takes girlfriend to his parents only when they are in a serious relationship. Man then ask his parents for permission to marry.
– This may come before men tell his parents but in Japanese tradition, saying “will you marry me?” will be the engagement not the gesture of a giving ring.
3. Asking Her Parents for Premission
– Boyfriend bring a box of sweets from departmet or a store to bring to her parents and ask for the permission to marry. This usually involve bowing down for both boyfriend and girlfriend to her parents.
4. Parents Meeting
– Parents of both parties meet for the first time usually in fancy restaurant or at hotel. At this meeting, ring is given to the woman. In return, man will recieve gift such as watch or suit that cost as much as the ring would had cost him. In the past, this ritual was “bride price” and it was not exactly gift exchange. This cusotm of gift exchange still remains in some families but for M and I, we will not do exchange but will have a get together with both families to have a meal.
How Japanese people go through with engagement may differ depending on the region or custom in the family and it may be affected by the social class and religion as well but generally, the engagement follows similar pattern.
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