Today’s date was great from the lunch, ship, walk around Asakusa and theme park but….. when I got on this crazy ride at the end… I seriously did not know that to do. I just wanted to let everything out of my system… from… yes.. my mouth..
I was so sick… I guess it is the first time I got sick like that in front of M…. I was glad that he understood and took care of me like.. trying to find rest rooms or buying water for me. It was not FUN… but I realized how comfortable I am to show my weakness in front of him and… show that I need help without being proud of myself.
I always found myself pretending to be strong and trying to be this cool girl who can handle “anything” and to be honest I got exhausted and that is probably why my last relationship was very stressful and it caused me to cry often. But in this relationship with M… I can balance myself properly almost like I am finally standing on a flat ground where I can balance perfectly and not worry that it will not be a tiny rope that I have to cross but a solid one.
I feel that we are good together everyday but a moment where I feel sick and… some guy would be disgusted with puking girl… but M really tried to find the best solution to put less stress for me. He tried to find ways like.. should we take bus to the nearest station.. do i need water? where is the rest room…. do i need early dinner … so on. I find this gesture really comfortable and thanksful because last thing I wanted was for him to get disgusted or angry for getting sick.
So I must say our bond had got stronger as he saw me get sick in front of him… but really… I don’t want to ride on that crazy ride again… I forgot what it was called but it gives you a illusion that you are in a house that spins around. You feel like you are rolling around in the house from ceiling to the floor but in fact you are not turning but the picture around you is…. It is a very short ride but it is not a good ride to ride after 2 consecutive rides that take you in a circle motion.